Rainy Day

Thank God it's raining. It feels so nice and cozy and comforting. I know all you sun-lovers out there are grumbling, but one of my favorite smells ever is the first rain on asphalt (which I got to experience today), and one of my favorite things to do is be cozy inside with kitties, book, and yummy things to eat, while it's raining outside. Also, sitting and looking out at the rain is incredibly comforting to me. Our new apartment has a very nice rainy-day view, I've just noticed. I'm so thankful we can see trees and sky from our living room and bedroom. Actually, from all the windows.

It's not even really rain. It's a drizzle. But close enough.

I've been at a really great work off-site the last two days. Lots of stuff that I actually *wanted* to hear about and some new things to learn. Seeing nice people that I haven't seen in awhile. Having a really good peanut butter cookie. Getting home early. :)

But I notice that these work things, or any large group thing, brings up my old shyness. The one I've worked so hard to try and 'grow out of'. I was talking to one of our regional directors -- he's an extremely funny man, very witty and clever and smart -- and I just felt like a total dud. I'm like, "How's the new position working out?" and then kicking myself. I should have had a witty comment! I should be making him laugh! I should be participating in mutual cleverness! But no, I'm all shop-talk. How dull can you get? I don't even like shop-talk!

So I am being brave. I volunteered to work on our disaster-preparedness committee. Maybe I figured all our recent havoc at home has left me with something to contribute. I don't know. It's scary, because it's a corporate-wide thing and will probably entail some responsibility and accountability and require me to actually speak up with what I think. At least, that's what I'm hoping... I need something that I believe in to work on. And I definitely believe in preparing for things. That's a Virgo for you. But moreover, I'm hoping that it helps me be a little more visible, but on my own terms. Visible doing something I am into, doing something well. Here's a silly thought: I'd like to be respected. At work! How novel. Actually, maybe I should change that to: I'd like to feel respected. I'm not sure exactly what I mean, but that's a start.

We did a Myers-Briggs test in the offsite. I already knew I was/am an INFJ.

INFJs are gentle, caring, complex and highly intuitive individuals. Artistic and creative, they live in a world of hidden meanings and possibilities. Only one percent of the population has an INFJ Personality Type, making it the most rare of all the types.

Go, me!

INFJs place great importance on havings things orderly and systematic in their outer world. They put a lot of energy into identifying the best system for getting things done, and constantly define and re-define the priorities in their lives. On the other hand, INFJs operate within themselves on an intuitive basis which is entirely spontaneous. They know things intuitively, without being able to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the subject at hand. They are usually right, and they usually know it. Consequently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions. This is something of a conflict between the inner and outer worlds, and may result in the INFJ not being as organized as other Judging types tend to be. Or we may see some signs of disarray in an otherwise orderly tendency, such as a consistently messy desk.

Ah, yes. My kitchen is very orderly. My files, not so much. But who likes an always-right know-it-all?

The INFJ individual is gifted in ways that other types are not.

Why, thank you!

Heh, heh. I've also heard that INFJs looooove personality tests, which is very true in my case. I love this stuff.

Well anyway. I'm trying to branch out, make some new friends, take a few risks, try some new things. If you're not a little scared, you're not making progress, right? Right.

Time to go bake some cookies, turn on the heater and cozy up for the night.