The Sick House (Po, Po Pitiful Me)

Yeah. We're sick. I've got some kind of flu-like bug that hit hard yesterday afternoon. Body aches, chills, sore throat, the works. Terri continues to feel awful, with similar symptoms, on top of her usual crummy symptoms. We are a pair.

I could be glib and say that we keep taking turns feeling slightly better than the other so we've been managing to take care of each other, but the reality is that Terri is feeling so terrible and the only reason I asked her to make me a smoothie yesterday was because at the time I was aching so badly, I really could not stand up and make it myself. Luckily she was feeling the tiniest bit better yesterday so was able to help me out at the worst times of it (typical flu, hit hard and fast), but today she is back to feeling terrible, and although I'm on the mend (apparently) I'm still pretty yucked out too.

It's not the best time here at our casa.

It's so hard to watch Terri feeling so awful, day after day after day. This latest downturn has been pretty bad. She felt pretty good after the doctor visit on the 7th, but ever since then it's been bad. Who knows if she picked up the bug, which I now have, and that's why she's been so sick lately? We don't know. It doesn't matter. CFS/Lyme/whatever-this-shit-is is brutal and unyeilding and cruel. Sometimes I get so angry and upset and frustrated and feel so helpless. Being sick myself doesn't help.

I wonder if my freakout on Monday was just the beginning of this bug; I just had a bad, anxious feeling all day. Yesterday I really thought it was just allergies, but I betcha the bug was brewing.

I couldn't go to my class last night because I really could not handle sitting or driving or being out in the world. I want to drop the class but probably right now is not the best time to make that decision. It's a terrible class but it would be nice to have it out of the way. I'm feeling extremely pessimistic today so I'll wait until next week to make that decision.

Anyway. I am a big, pitiful whiner today. The only good thing is that I'm on page 721 of The Witching Hour (only 300-some pages to go!) and it's totally engrossing and wonderfully dark. And the best thing is, even though it's a re-read, I can't remember what happens at the end.

Apparently I could whine for ages so I'll sign off now and see if I can finish my book. I hope my optimism comes back when I get over this bug.