Saturday, October 07, 2006

Blue Skies

It's a gorgeous day here in Alameda. Yesterday was gray and chilly all day, but today I woke up to bright blue skies. Nice.

I feel like I'm losing focus on my projects. I think I've got a lot of things going on in my head, and maybe some battling priorities. I'm trying not to worry about it and just letting the priorities take care of themselves (but it's hard). It is interesting that every time I consider taking a job that isn't exactly right, it either disappears or I can't stop thinking about it and I pull out of it. When it disappears (for instance, a pet-sitting possibility doesn't write back or something), I feel scared that I did something wrong... but when I really think about it, I see that there was a big question in my heart about it. So, maybe the Universe is sort of taking a load off for me. Giving me a little space to deal with all the other stress in my life before handing me some more big projects.

I have a tendency to get a little obsessive about these things, so it's good that there seems to be a natural pressure valve!

But what else is going on? Today we are celebrating Terri's birthday. Yesterday was the actual day, but we weren't able to do much celebrating (just a little)... too many other things happening. But today is the day! She has a big pile of presents waiting to be opened, and a beautiful day waiting to be explored. Happy birthday, sweetie. You deserve an amazing year, to make up for the last one. Nothing but good things coming your way.

We want a baby. We are both becoming very baby-focused. I can't watch shows in which babies have bad endings. She is smiling and interacting with babies in waiting rooms. It's hard to think about having a Little, when our house is SO not a good place to have one, but we can do the planning right now! And then when things look a little more stable/settled (soon!) we will get started. It's very exciting. It's a very hopeful goal; it gives us hope.

It is funny to become a cliche, though. Looking through profiles, deciding what genetic material matters and what doesn't. We're considering various cousins of hers. I feel a little like an HBO special, but it's fun. I can't wait to get started.

We're ready, but our life isn't quite there. Yet. So we work on both simulataneously.

Well. I'm off to make yummy coffee to start the day.

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