Book: The Lace Reader

This was this month's book-club pick. We met and discussed last night. Here's the consensus:

What We Liked:

We loved the fantastic sense of place: modern-day Salem, Massachusetts. A very good feel for being a "local" in a very touristy town (not unlike living in San Francisco or any other highly popular city). A fantastic family mystery told in a page-turning style. A sympathetic and interesting main character. We all really enjoyed the book, being completely caught up in the story.

Towner (real name: Sophya) is called back to Salem when her great-aunt (or is she her grandmother? another point of discussion last night) is missing. After having escaped Salem for so long (after innumerable family tragedies), Towner is loathe to return. However, she does, and is immediately swept back into her family drama. Having lost her twin sister when she was a teenager, Towner recoils from reconnecting with her past. But her past rushes up to greet her in the form of bewildered, heartbroken ex-boyfriends; horrifyingly abusive ex-uncles; reclusive, isolated mothers; and a deep mystery that just won't die.

What We Didn't Love So Much:

This book, while totally engrossing and enjoyable, was plagued by red herrings, trails to nowhere, and a confusing family tree. We spent a long time trying to figure out how everyone was related, and puzzling over the timeline of events. The main character, Towner, is admittedly an unreliable narrator (which leads to a big twist at the end, which I totally did not see coming, but other people picked up on clues more than I did), which makes the entire story the tiniest bit murky, but never once were we bored, or uninterested in the story.

We wanted more about "lace reading" -- fortune-telling, using hand-tatted lace. We wanted more explanation about what exactly happened at certain points. We wanted resolution for some of these tantalizing side journeys which were never completed.

In spite of all these small flaws, it was agreed: we all completely enjoyed the book.

**

Pardon the terrible book review, but I am tired and unable to really come up with more to say about it. It was good. It would fall under the category of "great for travel" or "good vacation book" or "enjoyable vaguely gothic page-turner with a touch of romance, mystery, suspense."

Book club, however, was fantastic. Great dinner, lovely friends, interesting discussion. I nearly fell asleep by 9:30 (even after a double espresso) so had to call it quits before I wanted to, but it was a lovely evening.

Next book pick is still TBA. Her Fearful Symmetry was tossed out as a suggestion, and I threw The Little Stranger into the ring as well. A few others were named... we'll know by the end of the week what it'll be.

Will now stop babbling incoherently. Ta!

Book: Forests of the Heart

I was in a bit of a reading pickle, having read all my library books and not knowing what to read next, when I remembered I had this de Lint tucked away on my bookshelf, for "emergencies." Charles de Lint! Always good in a reading emergency.

I'd picked this one up once or twice before, but for some reason couldn't get into it. However, this time it "took" and, as per usual when reading de Lint, was instantly swept up and away to Newford, where nobody does blending of myth, magic, and urban realism like de Lint.

Bettina San Miguel, a Mexican-Indian (meaning Mexican Indian, I think) healer, has found herself in Newford, living in an eclectic artists' retreat, doing modeling for the artists and creating small healing charms for the residents. She is unsure what she is doing here, until one day she looks out the back window and sees a group of men standing around in the yard. She senses magic clinging to them, although they appear to be ordinary, slightly rough dark men. Through a series of rather dramatic events, it is revealed that they are actually homeless, roaming Irish spirits, brought over from the Old Country with the immigrants, now becoming harder and angrier and fiercer as they hatch plans to take the New World land from the native spirits which currently reside here.

There were many storylines interweaving closer and closer together until they all came together in a single focal point, and all of them were interesting. However, unlike de Lint's older novels, I didn't feel as though there was quite as much introspection within the characters this time. I felt as though there were a few (small, but noticeable) holes in the character's inner lives (as revealed to us, anyway). For instance, Ellie, a sculptor who plays a key role in the book, apparently carries an astounding amount of power/magic inside her. She has been completely unaware of this until Bettina tells her... and even though she and her magic are essential to the story, we don't feel her magic. She never quite feels it either... apparently it just exists, whether she knows it or not.

Which is what I assume happens usually anyway in real life. We all carry power and magic within us, and often we have no idea. But, when reading about it, I'd like to have a feeling of revelation, of magic blossoming. Still, that's a small quibble.

Lots of action in this book, and lots of old familiar characters popping up here and there. I really enjoyed this book, more than I thought I would. It was sort of sad, however. Blending Celtic, Mexican, and Native American myths and spiritualism, I learned a lot while being completely engrossed in the story.

One part in particular really got to me. In Bettina's past, she was trained in brujera, magical healing arts, by her grandmother, in the New Mexico deserts. As part of her training, she was introduced to the myth-time, where the spirits live. On her first solo visit to the myth-time, she encounters a small band of brightly-colored los cadejos, spirit-dogs. She is drawn to them, as they play and sing, so lively and cheerful. And yet, they are homeless, and wish nothing more than to have a home, to have someone know them. Bettina invites them and they leap into her chest, to be carried about with her always... until a tragedy turns her away from all spirit dogs, and they leave her. With an empty heart.

In the end, they are reunited. This is what made me so happy and broke my heart, all at the same time.

"Have you though more of our bargain?" she asked. "What you would like in return for the help you gave me?"
"Si. We want you to be our friend."
Bettina laughed and shook her head. "We are already friends."
"We want to be friends forever."
"That is not something friends bargain over," Bettina told them.
"That is all we want."
"Nothing more."
"!Nada, Nada, Nada!"
"But you have this already," Bettina said.
"Then we are content."
"Here in the forest of your heart."
"Where we have our beautiful home."
"La casa del cadejos."
"We are content."

For some reason this made me think of our sweet Tiger Lily, whom I found as a little lost kitty, desperate for a home and love. She adopted me instantly and I fell in love with her on the spot. She left us, too soon, last September and I still find myself in tears often, missing her deeply. She was such a presence in our home and hearts. After finishing this book, late at night, I just cried and cried. I know she is living in my heart and keeping close tabs on us, but I still want her back, every day.

Anyway. This was a great book, and if you like de Lint, you'll love this one as well. I wouldn't start here, however. Still, it reminded me of this little idea inside which has been tugging at me, saying that it wants to go to the desert. We will see. I am needing wide open spaces and clean air and quiet dark nights with brilliant stars. I'm not generally a desert person (preferring forests) but this has been nagging at me for awhile. Who knows what the next year will bring?

I'm so tired and this SSDI crap is taking its toll on us. I've said it before and I'll say it again; I can't wait for April 13th so we can finally take a step forward. I'm exhausted (Terri is beyond exhausted) and trying to just keep my sights on what's immediately in front of me, placing a temporary hiatus on all worries, plans, "shoulds" and wishes. Two more weeks. We can do it.

library books and stuff

Apparently I have worn myself out lately. I woke up on Thursday with a tummyache, felt horribly unrested, so decided to stay in bed a wee bit longer. A "wee bit" turned into 2-3 hours, and by the time I checked my email again my lovely boss had kindly suggested perhaps I just take the day off to rest. I took her advice. I think there is a lot of background stress happening and I'm having trouble slowing everything down enough to keep up with it all, so I end up spinning and spinning late into the night and not getting enough rest, etc. So, I rested. I slept in, then went to the library and got some great stuff:

• Tropic of Cancer, Henry Miller. Have always wanted to read this. It popped off the shelf at me, so I figured it was time. Or, at least, time to bring it home and see how it goes. You know how it is with library books. Paris in the 30s; debauchery. Sign me up!
• Witches Abroad, Terry Pratchett. The only Pratchett I've read so far is Good Omens, which of course I liked a whole lot but didn't lose my mind over, to the dismay of Pratchett/Gaiman fans the blogging-world over... still, was reminded by my walking buddy last night that he's very much worth reading, so I decided to give it a try. Can I just leap into Discworld or should I start somewhere else rather than here?
  
• Carry On, Jeeves, PG Wodehouse. Another classic author which I've never read. I started to read Remains of the Day last night, but it was just feeling too sad and melancholy (although of course beautifully written), so I decided to just return it and try again in a few months. However, I do love English-butler stories, so Jeeves and Wooster will be perfect, I think.
• The Third Man, Graham Greene. Another author I've seen in library shelves FOREVER. My walking buddy (from hereon called Jenn) also recommended Greene. This looked not-too-taxing and sort of noir-ish and fun. I think actually I've seen the movie, now that I think about it. But it was so long ago, I have no idea what the book is about, but I'm sure I'll enjoy it.
• The Te of Piglet, Benjamin Hoff. Because come on, it's Piglet! Perhaps a little Taoist Piglet-y philosophy will help carry me through until April 13. I like Taoist writings. This also just leapt off the shelf into my hand, so... how could I refuse? Also, anything classic-Pooh-related makes me happy.

As I said, I had started to read Remains of the Day last night, but although it was beautifully written and although I could tell that I would like it (someday), I really need something not so slow and melancholy. I'm a little overtired, overstressed, overworried (all of this sort of in the background... I'm not fully aware of worrying and stressing, but I am tired and feeling distracted, so am taking body cues and assuming I am all of these things). I need something interesting, fun, on the light side (but still worth reading). Luckily I already had a copy of Charles de Lint's Forests of the Heart, which I've been saving for an emergency. I picked it up last night and it's, of course, perfect. This particular story seems to be especially perfect for some reason. Good enough. Thank you, yet again, Mr. de Lint.

Also, a kind blogging friend suggested I read some Jane Hirshfield, which I will be requesting from the library since my local branch didn't have any today.

So, armed with a stack of excellent books, we hunker down to wait out the last few weeks before this dang hearing and getting on with the rest of the year already!

Book: PUSH

And now for something completely different.

As per my usual habit when a novel-based movie gets good reviews, I want to read the book before watching the movie. I know the movie is pretty intense, so I was prepared for an intense book.

And it was intense. And dense. And spare, at the same time. A little like the life it describes.

Claireece Precious Jones is 16 years old and lives with her abusive mother in Harlem. She has already had one child (at 12) by her father. She is obese, illiterate, falling to the bottom of a well of a million poverties. And yet... she wants to be more. Despite the fact that she cannot read, she likes school. She likes math. She wants to do well. If only... how?

Despite being pregnant with her second child (again by her father), she starts to do well at the new school her social worker has referred her to. Her teacher takes an interest in her, and she flourishes, learning to read, learning to write. She shows signs of being a poet.

Once she has her second baby, she starts to make big changes. She lives in a half-way house. She refuses contact with her horrible mother. She takes care of her child. And then... she finds out that her father has just died of AIDS. And she has to take the test, herself.

What more can you pile upon a single girl? Unfortunately, I know that this book is not an exaggeration for too many kids in this country. That alone makes me very sad. It's not an easy book to read. It's not an easy thought to have resting in your head.

Was the book good? Yes. Did I like it? I don't know. But it was worth reading.

Written by poet Sapphire, I am not quite sure what I think about the language, since I am completely ignorant of whether it feels true or not. Still, it was interesting.

"...My name? Precious Jones. Claireece Precious Jones to be exact. Birth date? November 4, 1970. Where? "Here," I say, "right chere in Harlem Hospital." "Nineteen seventy?" the nurse say confuse quiet. Then she say, "How old are you?" I say, "Twelve." I was heavy at twelve too, nobody get twelve 'less I tell them. I'm tall. I jus' know I'm over two hundred 'cause the needle on the scale in the bathroom stop there it don't can go no further. Last time they want to weigh me at school I say no. Why for, I know I'm fat. So what. Next topic for the day."

"I have to say sometimes I hate my muver. She don't love me. I wonder how she could love Little Mongo (thas my daughter). Mongo sound Spanish, don't it? Yeah, thas why I chose it, but what it is is short for Mongoloid Down Sinder, which is what she is; sometimes what I feel I is. I feel so stupid sometimes. So ugly, worth nuffin'. I could just sit here wif my muver everyday wif the shades drawed, watching TV, eat, watch TV, eat. Carl come over fuck us'es. Go from room to room, slap me on my ass when he through, holler WHEE WHEE! Call me name Butter Ball Big MamaTwo Ton of Fun. I hate hear him talk more than I hate fuck."

It's not a gentle book. It's harsh but good reading.

I am not at all sure I want to see the movie, however. Sometimes these things are more difficult to watch than they are to read about.

Anyway. That sort of wore me out. I have Remains of the Day sitting here waiting to be read, but it's actually already overdue at the library, so maybe I should choose something else. I have Of Human Bondage, or that medieval mystery I never finished, or a couple other books which looked good until I got them home, and a whole stack of romantic/historical fantasy which a friend lent me (I'm always ambivalent about romance, but the books look fun...). What I want to read is more E. Von Arnim, and Auntie Mame, which I just requested from the library. I also need to make my Once Upon A Time challenge list, but I am plumb out of energy for that. It will happen this weekend.

Sigh. Well, maybe I'll read Remains of the Day since I won't be returning it until Saturday at least anyway. May as well. I wish it were Room With A View.

restoring my faith in humanity

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Conservative Libertarian
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Reform

(if it doesn't play and you haven't seen it yet and want to, click here)

Also, I had written a, um, well, rather emotional response to that post on Facebook. I try to keep my mouth shut, but I have to say, when I read these upsetting, inflammatory conservative opinions (there are some rational ones, of course, but mostly the people speaking up are interested drawing direct lines from Obama to Hitler. People. COME. ON. That is so not okay.) -- that poem keeps running through my mind:

"THEY CAME FIRST for the Communists,

and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist.

THEN THEY CAME for the Jews,

and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew.

THEN THEY CAME for the trade unionists,

and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist.

THEN THEY CAME for the Catholics,

and I didn’t speak up because I was a Protestant.

THEN THEY CAME for me

and by that time no one was left to speak up."

I strongly believe that I have to speak up when things are being said or done that I don't feel is right. I know that's what the extremist conservatives are doing, and that's totally fine. We have freedom of speech, even and especially when I don't agree with what's being said. However, I don't want them to be the only voice speaking.

Enter Jon Stewart. Thank you!!!

healthcare rant

A comment on Facebook:

"I think many of you miss points in this bill. Of course its great for people to have insurance who have been denied, but that is what jobs are for..you are insured from your place of work. For those of you who can work get a job. We as Americans should not be made to have health insurance and then we are penalized if we refuse health insurance this bill is out rageous! Why not pass a bill for those who cannot work with the promise of health coverage..thats all that should have been done. I am someone who has many pre-existing health issues..many do you hear me say yay! No you don't nor will you. I have a job that covers me. Just another way to divide and then the Pres will come in and conqure and our world will me so much worse that I believe many of you acan't even begin to understand"

What?

1. Um, sorry, but not everyone can work. And not every job provides health coverage. And not every health coverage offered is affordable, because not every job pays a living wage.

2. You as an American are made to pay for car insurance and house insurance. What -- you don't WANT health insurance? Clearly you are someone who has never been without insurance and faced a life-threatening illness or injury. All it takes is the slip of a knife, a moment's ill-attention at the wheel, or a microscopic virus. And then your life will be ruined if you don't have health coverage.

3. I'd rather conquer the world through universal health care than war. Just sayin'.

4. I have to giggle a little at the image of World Dictator Obama making the world "so much worse that many of us can't even begin to understand." Yeah. That's going to happen.

This stuff makes my head hurt. People do not get how important this is. I for one am happy to pay higher taxes so that my fellow tea-partying, birther anti-choice Americans can quit worrying about health coverage.

Maybe I'm feeling extra-stressed because of the impending SSDI hearing, but this just burns me up. Fine. Go hide in a bunker and hoard food and explosives. I'll be out here working my ass off for your Social Security and Medicare which you are loathe to give up, even as you acknowledge that they are flawed. Kinda like the healthcare bill.

lawyers, doctors, and politicians

(and pretty green and white foliage)

Today was a very long day.

We got up early (early for Terri is 9 am -- it's hard for her to even function before 11) and got ready to go see Terri's SSDI lawyer. Her hearing is April 13th, so it's getting close. I got to meet the lawyer for the first time; I liked him a lot. The meeting wasn't exactly fun: we were prepping for the hearing, so Steve (the lawyer) wanted to go over everything. Which meant telling him (again -- for his final notes) everything about how the CFS has affected Terri. Which was hard. It wasn't very fun for everyone to examine in detail, with specific examples, how Terri went from being a star Ph.D student, highly-valued employee and much-loved therapist to being bed-ridden for up to 20 hours per day. It was hard not to cry, but we kept it together. I think he feels pretty good about the hearing, which is good. If she doesn't get approved, I will be beyond pissed, is all I can say.

Then, because we ARE waiting for SSDI and currently doing all this on my income, it was time for Job #2: checking on critters. I actually love my pet business and want to keep it no matter what happens. (Saturday I did Job #3, babysitting. Later this week I will continue working on Job #4, freelance design.) So we checked on some kitties and then checked on some doggies, which was actually pretty fun. Terri LOVES dogs, so she got lots of hugs and kisses from furry friends, and that was a good part in the day.

Then it was off to the doctor, to check on Terri's toes. AGAIN. Yes, the same toes which have been giving her problems for, oh, two years now? So. Back to the doctor.

Then it was 3 pm and time to go home. All I have to say about the health care reform passage is how thankful I am that at least I should soon be able to stop worrying about Terri getting dropped from health insurance if -- God forbid -- somehow I lose our insurance coverage. Her condition is frustrating and expensive for doctors and insurance companies and I'm sure they'd love to drop her like a hot potato. Regardless of whatever kinks need to be worked out, that is a huge relief for me. I pray those people we elected can make it work the way we all hope it can.

I just finished reading PUSH (the book Precious is based upon). I don't know what I think yet. It was not exactly cheerful. It was good, for sure. I can't say whether I "liked" or "enjoyed" it, because it's not the sort of thing you really "enjoy." But it was affecting and worth reading. More about that later.

So, it's the end of the day, and we are both exhausted. My stomach is upset because it's that time of the month and because I can't stomach the brownies which I was craving and made (cruel irony), and we are both worn out from all of this.

Mr. Lawyer: please do your job well.
Mr. Doctor: please take good care of my sweetie's toes.
Mr. and Ms. Politicians: we are the people you are working for. Please do right by us.

With that, it's time for flipping through magazines and resting in preparation for Job #1 (full-time corporate job, which thankfully I do happen to love). Sometimes I wonder why I'm not going like gangbusters on my painting or other endeavors, and then we have a day like today and I remember: oh yeah, it's because I am working my butt off already.

However - and I say this from the bottom of my heart - I do it with a heart full of love for this sweet darling person who makes me so happy to come home to her. This funny, caring, kind and supportive girl who tries to clean the house so I don't have to, who spends all day every day trying to figure out the puzzle of how to get well, how to have a life, how to make my life easier. We have to prove to the SSDI folks how sick and disabled she is, which just goes against every fiber of my being, as I see all the good things she is and all the good things she does.

With that, I think there is a Better Homes and Gardens with my name on it calling to me.

Book: Cemetery Dance

A year or two ago I went through a big Preston/Child spree, and kind of burned myself out on them. However, a year has passed and I was totally ready for another. I just found out there are two more that I hadn't read yet! Yippee!

I suppose these are crime thrillers, but they always have a supernatural edge, and a fabulous FBI character: Special Agent Aloysius Pendergast, New Orleans gentleman, quirky, inscrutable, mysterious and a rule-bender. I'm really not that much into police thrillers but I love these.

It's really all about Pendergast. He is just a fabulous character. Always impeccably dressed in specially-made black suits, pale and blond with silvery eyes, he is a true man of mystery. He lives in a warren of luxurious rooms at The Dakota (and also is the owner of a run-down mansion in another part of New York, and also has the family estate in New Orleans, I think). His family past is full of criminally insane aristocrats, including the delightfully evil Aunt Cornelia, who must be in a full five-point restraint even as she offers you tea and sherry and calls for the "servants" (she lives in a home for the criminally insane but conveniently forgets that fact.) He is never without lock picks, flashlights, test tubes, all manner of small but deadly weapons. Speaks any number of obscure languages, well-read, has exquisite taste (when on location, ships in foodstuffs and wines from his private collection), rarely shows emotions (but clearly, still waters run deep with this one). He has a diabolical brother, Diogenes, whom may or may not have died in one of the last books. He's an extremely compelling character (even meriting his own entry in Wikipedia)

His partner-in-crime in many of the books is the classic Italian New York cop, Vincent D'Agosta. Vinnie is emotional, hard-boiled, smart, a skeptic. He comes to respect Pendergast's unusual ways throughout the series, and now the two are fast friends (as much as anyone can be friends with Pendergast).

There is a full range of other interesting characters which make their appearance throughout the series: Bill Smithback, annoying reporter; the elusive Wren, reclusive researcher; Constance Greene, a mystery unto herself... the list goes on. Half the fun of these books are the characters.

As I said, in each book there is a police angle and a supernatural (or seemingly supernatural) occurence. Cemetery Dance is about zombiis. At the very beginning of the book, one of our favorite characters is brutally murdered by what appears to be a zombii. The zombii then attacks a series of other people, and soon the police are called in. Clues start to surface: voodoo symbols drawn on the walls, gris-gris found placed on the murdered persons, links to a mysterious cult deep in the Inwood Hill Park forest (a primordial forest on the island of Manhattan, which does actually exist. Another reason to love this series is a very strong sense of place, no matter where they are set.)

More murders and another zombii later, D'Agosta and Pendergast are starting to wonder if there really are zombiis roaming Manhattan, singling out individuals who have reason to pester the cult. Pendergast brings in an old tutor from New Orleans, who helps the two uncover more clues (another quirky side character). Is the cult really sacrificing animals to feed the zombiis? Are there actually zombiis terrorizing Manhattan? What the heck is going on here?

The conclusion of the story is very satisfying, although looking back, one must suspend disbelief at a number of points for it all to work, but all of the storylines are so entertaining and satisfying that I didn't mind at all.

These authors have hits and misses, and this was definitely a hit. Completely satisfying, mildly disturbing/scary (yet still funny and interesting), great characters, and a whole lot of Pendergast. I loved every minute of it. This is exactly what this sort of book should be: thrilling, entertaining, full of fun characters, addictive, lightweight and satisfying. The best part is that a clue to the next book is given at the very end of this book... and my library has the next book! Woohoo!

Book: Strangers in Paradise (complete collection)

(featuring this cover at full size so you can see the pretty art...)

Earlier this week I finished the entire series of my all-time favorite graphic novel, the acclaimed and beloved Strangers In Paradise. I read my first SiP a long, long time ago, probably at least nine years ago. A friend recommended them to me when she found out I had never read a graphic novel. (I've still only read a handful of titles, for some reason. I'm picky.) She said, "This is the PERFECT graphic novel for you to start on." Boy, was she ever right. She handed me a giant stack, which was probably about the first 1/3 of the story. I got so hooked that I subscribed to another year or two of them, and then one thing led to another and somehow I got out of the habit, only about 2/3 of the way through the entire story.

I've been wanting to catch up and find out how it all ended, and my walking partner said that she had the entire series in the collected books and that she would lend them to me!! Of course I jumped at the offer. I considered just figuring out where I left off and reading the last third or so, but I eventually decided to read the entire series again.

Wheee! What an amazing ride! Soooo worth reading all of them, and in one big gulp. I couldn't stop reading.

The basics of the story is this. There are two high school girls, Francine Peters and Katina Choovanski ("Katchoo" for short). They are best of friends, although they are a study in opposites. Francine is tall, curvy, innocent, pretty, somewhat vulnerable, sometimes not too smart, all empathy and feminine charm. Katchoo is small, wiry, tough, an artist with a hell of a backstory. And she loves Francine with all her heart.

We follow Francine and Katchoo through young adulthood, up through their early 30s. Along the way we meet and fall in love with (or hate) a cast of characters which are just like the friends you wished you always had (or not). There's love. There's marriage. There's death. There's the mob (with a twist). There's babies (eventually). And through it all, there's the big truth that everybody knows, and the big question which leads you through the entire story.

The truth: Katchoo and Francine belong together.
The question: But in what way?

Francine has always dreamed of the perfect husband, the perfect family, the perfect house. All she's ever wanted to do was make the eventual perfect husband happy. She loves Katchoo, but not in "that way." Or does she? Can she overcome her upbringing, society, her mother, the church... and figure out what her heart really wants?

All Katchoo wants is Francine. She wants to get away from her terrible past. She wants to make art and be with Francine, and that's about it. But roadblocks in every conceivable form keep dropping directly in her path. Will she eventually give up on Francine, who cannot seem to make up her mind? Will Life (with a capital "L") prove to be too much for the world-weary Katchoo? Will she walk away from the love of her life to try and create a life she can live with?

The drama! The heartache! The humor! The incredible art!

This series is flawless and heartwrenching and fun and charming and has a happy, happy ending. Eventually. Oh, that ending was worth waiting for. (I'm not really spoiling anything since we gets hints of it along the way, but HOW it happens is a treat.)

I can't say enough about this series. It's like Buffy in it's magnificence. You think it's one thing... but it's really so much deeper and more complex, and has an incredible story arc which sweeps you up and makes you think about all the things in your life.

Read it. Now. (need more convincing? Check out the website, and Wikipedia...)

a sunny afternoon in san francisco

For the last two days I've been in San Francisco for an advanced Photoshop class. Just could not have been a prettier two days in a prettier city.

My class was held right across the street from the TransAmerica building (that big tall pointy one). I kind of love the TransAmerica building. It's so huge. (this photo was taken up on the hill at the beginning of North Beach, the old Italian section of the city - and my favorite neighborhood - where I hiked up before class to get a cup of coffee and a perfect almond croissant)

Both days I had a nice hour-and-fifteen-minute lunch. I completely and unabashedly took advantage of the fact that it was gorgeous weather, that we were so close to North Beach, and that I had over an hour to do whatever I wanted in my favorite part of town. Yesterday I didn't have my camera, so I just walked around and ate my lunch and read my book and enjoyed it completely. Today I did the exact same thing, only I took photos.

I am *so* doing this when we have a garden. Love these rusty tomato can planters.

I love Oakland, but I would jump at the chance for us to have a cozy apartment in North Beach. In my fantasy apartment, it's on a quiet side street, with a fireplace and big bay windows like these, and we have both stories to ourselves, and a rooftop garden.

Both days I got an absolutely amazing sandwich at Molinari's Italian deli. For about a dollar and a half more than a Subway sandwich, you can get a work of art that will blow your sandwich-loving mind. I was too preoccupied with figuring out which combination of fresh mozzarella, sundried tomatoes, basil spread and other various amazing toppings to put on my roll (which you choose for yourself out of a bin) to remember to take a photo, but it's total old-school Italian New-York style deli. I love it. Today when I went there, the guy remembered me, which earned him a tip in the tip jar. So friendly and fun. And delicious. Did I mention delicious?

However, after I devoured my sandwich, I did remember to take a photo of where I ate it: Washington Square park. Sitting on a warm park bench, listening to cathedral bells, watching kids and dogs play, and little old Asian ladies doing tai chi in the shade, feeling completely warm and full of amazing sandwich, I was supremely happy for about a half hour here.

On the stroll back to class, I decided to finally stop in to Stella Pastries, a traditional Italian pastry and cookie shop. I've wanted to go here ever since I moved here, but somehow just never have. But today was the day!

I sat at that little table by the door and had my first-ever slice of sacripantina. Holy cannoli, it was good. Light but rich, full of creamy flavor. I could easily have been happy with only half a slice, but there was only me there eating, and really, how can you waste half a slice of this? It was far too delicate to box up and have sitting in my bag for another 4-5 hours until I got home. So... I ate it all, every bite. I was so full but extremely happy.

Thankfully I had thought ahead and so had only eaten half my sandwich (which I am going to have for dinner as soon as I finish writing this), so it wasn't as bad as it could have been. I ate entirely too much the last two days, but frankly I really don't care, since I enjoyed every bite, and I also hiked across town a fair bit.

I got back to class with a few minutes to spare, and there were my (two!) classmates, sitting there with Subway wrappers and Starbucks fruit cups in front of them, fiddling around online, still in the stuffy classroom. I had a brief moment of wanting to shake them, to say, "Don't you realize you could have had an orgasmic sandwich experience in Washington Square? Don't you know we're right next to North Beach? Subway? Subway!?!?" But I refrained, and instead, happily sat back down, in a blissful sunny carb-haze.

Anyway. I have lots more pictures but I will dole them out as I work on them (with my new Photoshop skills!). Right now, there is a sandwich waiting for me.

Sometimes I am so in love with San Francisco it hurts. Today was one of those days.

no thoughtless post-structuralists here

Terri's sister gave us each a subscription to a magazine of our choice last year, and I chose The London Review of Books. I figured, hey, books and an international perspective sounds good. Every month or so, I get a large tabloid-sized magazine chock-full of super-smart essays about books. As a graphic designer, I know that a "wall of text" is the kiss of death for most people... but I absolutely LOVE opening this magazine and seeing nothing but gigantic blocks of text. No pictures (maybe a small illustration or a poem inserted here and there), no photos, very few ads... just intelligent discussions about books which are usually way out of my usual comfort zone. I used to try to read every article in the Review, but quickly realized I am just not that intellectual; now I just skim through and read the interesting ones, get the gist of the others, and read the ads.

The ads in the back are fantastic. I sort of want to get The New York Review of Books next year just because I think I'd be more familiar with the books and writers, but I would miss these fantastic ads:

Accommodation Available

"Double bedroom in Kennington. Space in a book-filled, relaxed flat. We have two balconies, occasional parties, vigorous private lives and a Polish cleaner with firm views. Longer rather than shorter stays preferred. No thoughtless post-structuralists."

Holiday Rental

"Our Apennine ponies are direct descendants of Gaulish war ponies who came to Italy to invade the Roman Empire and liked it so much they decided to stay. To see the attraction visit www.xxx.com (two apartments with pool in North Tuscany and nobody gets put out to grass.)"

Personals

"It's true. I have more than 200 books about post-revolutionary Russia. It's my thing. I'm that guy. Write anyway."

"Man seeks woman to read The Hobbit with. Humans and Elves only; no Goblins."

"Difficult, discerning woman, six months out of six year relationship, forgotten how dating works, seeks intelligent, funny men to practice with. Timewasters welcome if sufficiently amusing/educational."

"There's usually an atmosphere of dread when I show up at a party. Not so the next one, when you accompany me as both my groom to be and my designated driver. Easily drunk, garrulous F, 41, prone to molesting the teenage sons of suburban dinner party hosts and crying over the petit fours. WLTM sober expert in public apology, to age 50."

Oh, so many more. The ads are almost the best part of the whole thing. The essays are almost too smart for me and are difficult to review, but the ads are right up my alley. I'll try to post some of the best ones as I see them.

Reading The Lace Reader for book club. It's pretty good but a little bit odd. However, kind of suits my mood. I could use a week by the lake with a pile of books. And a big stack of Reviews to chuckle over.

Driving With Buddy (The Big Boy)

It was a stunningly beautiful day today: mid-60s, sunny, blue skies. Buddy was practically begging to go out for a cruise, so we took him out for a spin.

He wanted to by and see some of his friends at the security office...
Then of course he wanted to see the construction happening a few blocks away. He's such a boy.
Here is a picture of his dash. You know, just because. That's the trunk-pop button in the middle there. Um, and the stereo. And it was actually 3:30... I hadn't figured out how to set the clock yet (but I figured it out later)
Terri drove for awhile, and then I drove while she took pictures (including all of the ones above). We drove around town and then up into the hills to Lake Temescal for a little sitting in the sun by the water.
Now we're home. I was craving something savory and hearty for dinner, so I pulled out an old favorite cookbook, The Supper Book, by Marion Cunningham. I have this one and The Breakfast Book and they are both just about the coziest cookbooks ever invented. If you see them in a thrift store or book sale, grab them.

I made garlic rolls and this pasta-mushroom-brown butter thing, both of which were simple and flavorful and amazing. I also made this very easy coconut pudding/custard thing. You make it in the blender and then pour it into dishes and bake. Couldn't be easier. And, delicious.

Such a nice day today. I started it by sitting out on the porch in the sun, having a nice little cup of coffee and reading the London Review of Books, and cracking up over the ads in the back (which is another post). A great way to start the day.

We were incredibly grateful that Terri was feeling a bit better and was able to get out for a drive. It's been a rough winter for her. It's pretty obvious that the cold is detrimental to her; if we have to stay here another winter, we will be doing serious winterizing. Which is crazy, because this is California... but she can't take 50-degree rooms for months on end. But hopefully next winter we'll be in our cozy new house somewhere. ?? We'll see. We love it here (aside from the cold) but of course we'd love our own house.

Anyway. A nice day, and Buddy continues to be a fantastic car for us. Come on by and we'll take you for a spin. Everyone waves and checks him out (Terri LOVES this aspect). It's pretty fun.

Springtime Cuteness

Have you seen this? The epitome of springtime cuteness (for maximum cuteness, have the sound on):

I grew up one town over from Corvallis, home of Oregon State University (where I later got my degree). It's a school known mostly for agriculture and business. What was an art major doing there? It's a long story. But anyway. Agriculture. There were "lambing barns" on campus. Which meant that every spring, you could go over and watch little lambs being born. We used to go sometimes when I was little. We'd bundle up and head over to the warm barns, to stick our fingers through the fences and let the lambs suck on our fingertips, to watch the sheep give birth to their babies, to watch their first wobbly little steps.

But I don't think I ever saw anything as cute as this little lamb springing through the house. Can haz?

I know I bitched and moaned all fall about how warm it was and when was winter coming anyway, and begged for the rain and the cold. Well, we got it in buckets and I loved it; but now I'm ready for the spring. Warm sun and flowers and blue skies sounds pretty good right about now. I'm tired of our house being freezing all the time. I want to do my painting but it's hard to be creative when your "studio" is 50 degrees.

And of course, we can't wait to go cruising in our new car. So far, its name is "Buddy" or "the Big Boy." We'll see what sticks. But this is a car that needs a name. It is made of awesome.

Watch Out, Oakland!

We are now the proud owners of a 1999 Police Interceptor! "Big Boy" joins my little Corolla in our little auto family.

What a kick.

We drove the big guy around this afternoon, and it is an experience driving around an ex-cop-car. People either stared and got out of our way, or smiled and waved (or, apparently yelling obscenities. Interesting). Terri was grinning ear to ear as she waved back. What a hoot!

Her little Honda finally went kaput, so it was time for an upgrade. She doesn't drive a whole lot so she decided to just get whatever she wanted, as long as it was reliable and fit the budget. This is both, and also fulfills (just a wee bit) her fantasy of being a cop. I swear, I haven't seen her that happy in months. She was having the time of her life driving it around.

I think I see some mirrored aviator glasses in her future.

What a relief. I hate car stuff. This car is super safe, very fast, and fun to drive. It still has that big grate on the front, so I'm not going to worry about bumping into *anything*. We were just so tickled as we cruised around. Hee!

(GIANT thank-you to Shea, for driving down to Fremont with me to get the car!! Diet Pepsi six-pack is on me!)

The New Look

I used to go fabric/pattern shopping with my mom all the time. I loved flipping through the big pattern books... Simplicity, Butterick, and my favorite, The New Look (I think they were Vogue patterns). These were, of course, the more complicated patterns which my mom didn't have time to fiddle with, but I always wanted to look at them.

Anyway. Tangent! Here's my new look: short hair for spring! Rather a bit shorter than I expected, but it will be perfect in about a month.

Terri has been having serious appetite problems, so I've been trying to find good things for her to eat. "Good things" including, um, anything that sounds good. Which is not the same as healthy. But frankly, calories trump "healthy," so we have Pop-Tarts, Quadratini cookies, and pretty much anything else I can think of. Which DOES include asparagus; thank god it's asparagus season! Because the unfortunate thing is that *my* appetite isn't suffering...

I should do a post soon about some recent cooking. I've been obsessed with this new cookbook, Student's Vegetarian Cooking. Everything I've tried has been so yummy, so cheap, so easy. I think most recipes are vegan (or easily made vegan) and it's been fun to try some new things (and not have to slave away all night for them). More about this later.

On the reading front, I got totally sucked into the Strangers in Paradise world, so I am reading the entire series start to finish. I'd like to spend all day devouring them, but... however, will give my impressions after the complete self-indulgence of reading six giant collected books.

Yep. That's about it from here for now.

Book: The Bible (A Biography) (updated)

Wow. Super-duper interesting book by one of my favorite authors, Karen Armstrong, who I am rarely smart enough to read all the way through (although I loved her autobiographical works).

My computer is almost out of juice so I'll keep this one short, with perhaps some edits later.

This wasn't a book on Christianity, per se, nor was it a book about religion. What it was, was a book about a book, and how that book got written, and how people studied it throughout the ages, and what that book currently means in modern society. That book being, of course, The Bible.

It was utterly fascinating.

I got a bit lost in the first few chapters, but mostly because I am no Bible scholar. My knowledge of the Bible mostly comes from a large children's Bible my grandma gave me long ago (which I read cover to cover and enjoyed immensely), and some bits and pieces picked up along the way from various churches I've gone to over the years. But I don't even know if we have a Bible in the house. Maybe Terri has one? I think I might have a mini-one from my grandma.

Shoot, out of juice. More to come. Let this just be a teaser -- check back later in the day!

**

OK, sorry about that.

Anyway. Back to Bible-talk. So, the book was incredibly interesting. She describes how the Bible started out as a collection of writings from different authors, some contradicting each other. They did not start out as a book at all. Over time, these writings were collected and various Jewish scholars assembled the Old Testament (which I believe is part of the Torah), which purposefully left in conflicting statements, as the study of the Bible was originally meant to be discussed, not taken literally. In fact, the original assemblers of the Bible were not sure there should be a written document at all, as the "Living Word" should be spoken and discussed, not set down in stone where there might be danger of misinterpretation and literalism. (ahem)

Later on, once Christianity was saved from obscurity by Constantine, the New Testament was put together in similar fashion. No one is entirely sure who actually wrote the various parts of the Bible. They are attributed to authors such as "J" and "E" and "Mark" and "Paul" but we don't know who these people actually were. And again, we have conflicting stories. And again, the Bible was originally intended to be a starting point for discussion and personal truth-finding -- not a literal document at all.

Various scholars later on studied the Bible (exegesis) with various results. The one that I liked the best and felt most optimistic about (and indeed, Karen Armstrong seems to agree) was one ancient rabbi who said that scripture should be read with the most charitable interpretation being the most accurate. Basically, don't look for reasons to hate, make war, or kill your neighbor in the Bible. Look for reasons to love, understand, make peace, bridge gaps.

Anyway... this little book was entirely crammed with super-interesting history. She stays away from opinions until the epilogue, where she writes a very nice chapter on how, in this time of fundamentalist Christianity/religion and fundamentalist secularism (where each automatically assumes everyone else is dead wrong), we ought to use the Bible as a tool for reconciliation, understanding, and peace-making. I really appreciated this viewpoint, since I have often felt conflicted about my own feelings towards religion.

I loved reading my children's Bible and mostly just read it for the Old Testament stories -- once we got to the New Testament, I got a little bored, although I always have loved (and still do) Jesus stories. In the words of King Missile, Jesus was way cool. I have no beef with Jesus. I don't really love modern extremism Christianity (or any extreme version of religion, which I think isn't really religion at all but dangerous fanaticism), but I am sort of fascinated with the Bible and religions in general.

Since this was not a book about Judaism or Christianity, but a book about the Bible, I didn't come away feeling like I was being preached to in any sense -- rather, it was a highly interesting history lesson that left me with a lot to think about. It really gives you a sense of how we really are all interconnected on a big level, no matter what your religion or nonreligion or race or culture. We can get so bogged down in minutiae that we lose sight of the important things: being kind, reaching for understanding, looking for the good, and making peace.

Now, it's time for something a little less heavy. I'm reading that medieval murder mystery (about the death of Edward II) and also a friend is lending me the full canon of SIP!!! Oh my goodness, I might just have to read the entire series start to finish.

Happiness: Thrifting

Inspired by this lovely post by Tea and Cookies.

There are people who do not go, who do not know how to go, thrifting. Shocking, I know.

Maybe they are squicked out by "other people's stuff." Maybe they don't have time. Maybe it never occurs to them. I don't know. I don't get it.

But thankfully, I am not one of these people. I have the bug. I inherited it from my mother, who I suspect originally learned to go thrifting more out of necessity than desire, but who now joins me on exuberant thrifting adventures when we get together.

Everyone seems to have their own style when it comes to thrifting. There are those who go religiously every week, on a circuit. There are those dedicated garage-sale shoppers. Then there's my own style, which is to go about once a month or so, when I get the undeniable urge for some retail therapy. I don't need anything... but I like to go shopping. And I'm trying to be more creative with my wardrobe. And I'm trying not to spend too much money on things we don't need. And I like treasure-hunting.

My favorite place is the Oakland Chinatown Salvation Army, especially when they are having their half-off sale ("practically free" is my favorite price for anything). This location is a major drop-off point and it's a huge store, so I usually have good luck there. My second favorite place is the Alameda Goodwill, also, I suspect, a major drop-off place for Alameda. I have found some great scores there, although their prices are higher than S.A.

I like to go when I can spend at least two hours (although I can pack a lot into a lunch hour). I try to go through the entire store methodically, because that is how you find the treasures. I don't like to rush. I first go through the clothing, then the linens, then the housewares, and finally the books and/or miscellany. I totally get into the zone when I'm doing this. It's not a very social activity for me. I need to concentrate.

Here are my own personal rules and/or methods for thrifting.

1. Never buy anything irrevocably stained, torn, or damaged. Unless it's something easy like a missing button, I know I won't go the extra mile to salvage it. I look very closely for stains and tears, and I don't hesitate to put back damaged items.

2. Never buy anything that I could buy new for about the same price: i.e., Old Navy clothes (or Mervyn's, or any other crummy off-brand). It's just not worth it; the clothes are not very high quality, and the buck or two I save doesn't make much difference for a crappy piece of clothing. Possible exception: scarves or kitschy themed T-shirts (if I happen to need kitschy themed t-shirts)

3. If it doesn't fit, isn't the right color, or I just don't immediately love it, I don't buy it. This is highly subjective. I make allowances for if I'm trying a new style, or something ethnic/vintage (lately I'm into India/sari-style tops), or things that are slightly too large. Often these things fall into the 'acceptable' category even though I wouldn't spend the money to buy them new, because I want to experiment or I just happen to love the item. However, if it's unflattering or not my color, I don't buy it, even if it's really high-quality.

4. Check the label. I always do a double-check when I find something from a really good catalog label like Sundance or Lands End or something like that. I also slow down for Banana Republic, J.Crew, Ann Taylor or any of the higher-end Macy's-type lines, or for obviously quality clothing from smaller unfamiliar brands. The fabric is the giveaway: if it's a nice fabric, and a nice color, then I check the label. If it's a good label, then I pull it out to inspect more closely. I always check the fabric content. The size is not as important; often the clothes have enlarged or shrunk slightly but are still completely wearable.

5. Be aware of my own danger zones. I have an unfortunate thing for certain types of ugly patterns and dishes. I don't know why, but I will always pull out a garish paisley or a 1970s-era crockery dish. I love them. I try to indulge in small doses. For example, maybe the paisley urge gets satisfied with a silk scarf, and the ugly pottery gets used for a cat food dish or a small planter. I try very hard not to buy "things" unless I absolutely love it. I'm a little more liberal with clothes because I sort through my closet regularly.

6. I only buy books if it's something I know has very little chance of being found at the library, or if it's a reference book (gardening, or art, or something like that). I don't buy novels unless it's something hard-to-find. This has more to do with not wanting to accumulate books than any sort of pickiness. If I could, I would buy bags of books regularly.

7. Save pants and skirts for a whole separate trip, since these are more difficult to sort through and must be tried on.

8. Before checking out, go over every item one more time to make sure they are all acceptable quality, and that I really love each thing. Recently I put back a brilliant green long-sleeve T-shirt from J.Crew which I loved, but the neckline wasn't right, and a really pretty, soft Abercrombie shirt, because the color wasn't anything special. I've also had to talk myself out of any number of silk bathrobes because they weren't exactly right.

Some recent good finds include:

* a brand-new Lands End fleece nightgown, which I've been eyeing all winter in the catalog but haven't ordered. Now mine for only $4!

* a silk thermal turtleneck for Terri, which she's worn all winter long

* a whole slew of ethnic embroidered tops, which I intend to wear during the summer

* high-quality yoga clothing, which are so comfy for at home or walking

* a lovely collectible teapot, to replace an old one which I didn't love

* a Ralph Lauren black winter coat, which has been perfect this year

I have a few things I'm always on the lookout for:

* a beautiful sugar bowl. I had one that I loved, but it got broken a few years ago.

* a classic, high-quality trenchcoat. I'm being very picky about this one.

* lovely old picture frames

* unusual, large vases or glass bowls for terrariums

* holiday items (this year I found a perfect holiday tree skirt)

* pretty, old sheets (I want to make a soft summer quilt from old sheets)

Anyway. Clearly this is a subject I could go on and on about. I love thrifting. I don't usually go garage sale shopping as an activity (I will drop by if I happen to be driving by a good one) because it requires more driving and mapping and so on, but I do love a good thrift shop. I like it better than discount shopping, which is similar, but not quite as exciting. I like the thrill of the hunt, and I like the relatively small impact on my wallet.

Paying more attention to living frugally has had many surprise benefits, but really going back to thrifting has been the one which I am really enjoying. It's so much fun, for so little money, and satisfies that shopping urge without too much damage to the bank account.

Next up for summer: a few garage-sale trips to the tonier areas of town, and a couple ventures into San Francisco thrifting. I'll find that trenchcoat yet...

Friday Fill-Ins

(lifted from Tea Leaves, whose answers I thought were just perfect)

1. A cup of tea is fast becoming my beverage of choice. So many options, so lovely and comforting and easy and delightful.

2. Snuggly kitties, soft chairs, and tons of books make a place feel like home.

3. Everything has its beauty, except those things resulting from a heart full of hate. Bigotry and hatred have no place in my life or my home.

4. The taste of strawberries makes me think of rich vanilla ice cream and perfect summer nights.

5. Art makes me intensely happy and/or thoughtful.

6. LOL I just noticed I forgot (unfortunately, the things I've been forgetting lately don't make me laugh out loud. Mostly I slap my forehead and sigh deeply and trudge back home again to retrieve them)

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to a nice walk with a friend, and then snuggling with Terri and kitties. Tomorrow my plans include lots of resting and a little working, and Sunday, I want to read, perhaps finish my painting, and make a good menu for the week. Monday I am getting my hair cut and hopefully relaxing the rest of the day!

Hmm

Bizarre string of days/weeks lately. Just weird, weird, weird stuff happening all around.

Today, I woke up in a slightly grumpy mood, and it didn't help that I had a stomachache. And then, that my hair rebelled and gave me the worst hair day I've had in years. And then that I drove all the way to work and realized, as I pulled into the parking lot (late) that I forgot something essential for the workday, so I had to go home and get it.

Sigh.

And then the day was just busy busy busy, with some extremely random weirdness thrown in. A good day work-wise, but then I made a lovely faux-pas at the end which makes me feel like a dummy and hope that I didn't hurt someone's feelings. Ugh.

And then diving deeper into the weirdness when I got home (no weirdness at home, just looking into the weirdness that came up during the day), which is unsettling.

My best friend emailed me something about how there is this major cosmic astrological upheaval happening right now through August. It makes sense, because things just do not feel right with the world.

I just feel like retreating slightly. Things don't feel quite stable. Books and solid, real things seem like good things to focus on right now. I have some fun bookish things to share, but will save it for tomorrow or the weekend when I'm thinking a little more clearly.

Is anyone else having this experience of things seeming incredibly weird lately?

Also...

Can someone please make this for me? Please?

St. Louis Gooey Butter Cake

I've had a really long, stressful, weird day and I think this would make it all better. Pretty please? Anyone? Anyone?

In Which Our Author Talks About Random Things...

Things like...

* I'm currently reading The Bible: A Biography (from the Books That Changed The World series) by Karen Armstrong. It's essentially a history of how the Bible came into being, who wrote it, and why, and how it's related to the Torah, etc. It's completely fascinating and a little bit above my head. It's taking me forever to read. But it's so interesting! The rise of Christianity is particularly interesting, especially how historical events played a part in Christianity being 'rescued' from obscurity. I have many thoughts about this book. It's not a religious book at all; it's a historical accounting, which makes it even more interesting to me. It actually made me want to look some things up in an actual Bible. I don't even know if we have one? I'm sure we do somewhere...

* We rescued an adorable husky puppy yesterday. He was running loose, and we managed to grab him after almost hitting him while driving. Poor guy was totally frantic and worn out. Thankfully he seemed glad to be captured, and didn't fight us. We put him in the car and called the number on his collar tag. His owner was completely shocked that he was out -- apparently he is usually in the back yard, but somehow escaped. We were so, so glad that that story had a happy ending! Although, we wouldn't have minded having a puppy visitor at our house for a little while...

* Is there something going on astrologically? Everywhere I look, people seem to be having an unusually grumpy time. Or maybe it's just me. Also, things just seem weird. Weird goings-on at work. Weird interactions with people at the store. Weird mood swings. Also this seems to be coinciding with the sudden onslaught of spring allergens. I don't ever notice my allergies (I don't get itchy eyes or nose or anything obvious), but apparently they are the reason why every spring, my ears fill with fluid and I get ear infections. This year I am just going to take the allergy medicine and see if I can keep my ears safe. The downside to this is that I'm very susceptible to allergy medicine side-effects, so I either feel totally drowsy and weird, or totally speedy and weird. Basically, things just seem weird. Is it me?

* Using an additive approach, there are a number of things I'd like to do more of. They include, in no particular order:

Going to the library and reading magazines

Sitting in coffeeshops and writing

Hiking or trail runs

Watch more movies (I am really bad at this for some reason; I end up half-watching TV/half-reading instead, because somehow I think a movie takes too much time. Bizarre!)

And of course, paint. Tonight is Tuesday: time to paint!

And also, go listen to people/authors speak.

* It is becoming very obvious that if we buy in Oakland, it will be a condo or a townhouse. We are holding out hope for a townhouse. But we are also thinking that in the spring, we'll be looking elsewhere, because we'd really like a house with a large yard. Petaluma, or Martinez, perhaps. We're going to drive around and look at surrounding towns. It's a little disappointing, but you never know what will happen!

* Also, I'm thinking of starting a support group for families affected by chronic illness. There are a few support groups for the people actually afflicted, but not any, that I can find, for the families or partners of the ill person. I know that we could certainly use some community and occasional help (even with things like: carrying furniture up the stairs, or perhaps someone might need some meals delivered sometimes, that sort of thing). Other people must, also. We can't get to church (it's too early in the day for Terri) and frankly we'd like to be surrounded by people who 'get it.' I'm thinking it would be more sharing/fellowship than therapy-style support. Get together once a month to share what's going on, see who needs help with what, etc. I think this could be really great.

That's about it. Everything feels a little weird right now for some reason. But I hold firm to my idea that this year is going to be a good one.